TRULY GONE & FORGOTTEN : THE BOY KING AND HIS GIANT

Fun fact: "The Boy King and his Giant" is what they used to call me during my brief career in twink porn.

It’s a story as old as time – Nazis invade a peaceful, seemingly feudal nation still in the throes of medieval tradition, murder the ruling family except the boy prince who manages to survive and dig up Nostradamus’ magical giant stone golem, and then the boy and the rock giant collect all the surviving citizens of the nation and take them overseas to live in America so that the Nazis … er, win?

Yes, apparently so! The Boy King is an interesting enough golden age character whose novelty alone makes up for some shaky art and writing, but most intriguing about his introductory story arc is that his weird and tremendous power is used entirely to facilitate a total retreat from invading Nazi forces. The French, to this day, take no end of shine about having seemingly folded before the Nazi military might, but imagine the rep the Boy King’s homeland of Swisslakia must have earned itself in its fictional equivalent of the European theater – they didn’t surrender, they just ran off! The Nazis win Swisslakia and all its peoples’ stuff! You wouldn’t advocate that as a strategy in Risk.

To the Boy King’s credit, however, he and his giant do end up facing a Nazi Tyrannosaurus Rex, as well as comicdom’s first and possibly only combination evil tattoo artist and accountant, and who goes by the name Dr.Plasma, which actually makes him sound like the friendly mascot for a blood drive.

Swisslakia's greatest hero during the Battle of Hauling Ass Out Of Here