The Caped Crusader’s everyday rogues gallery is filled with enough fright masks and freaks to establish itself as a pretty significant sideshow attraction, but – for some reason - there’s no shortage of mummies among his roster of baddies. Vampires you can see, vampires make some thematic sense, but there’s just something about the mummy. As the kids like to say.
|And then there's this mummy, whose |
sculpted abs irresistibly draw Robin's
Unwrapping Kiron at a Gotham City society function – I believe they planned to make him into soup, a la the Victorians. There’s something very Victorian about Gotham City … maybe it’s the sexual mores – the former Egyptian bandit leaps to his feet! Yes, he’s alive! Alive … and stealing! Having been robbed of the treasures of his tomb, he elects to steal another fortune from modern day Gotham. Yes, Kiron is an advocate against imperialist acquisition of foreign antiquities. I’m on his side.
|Yeah, the clue is "This guy's a Swede."|
The detecting might be less than stellar, but we’ll give Mister Mummy points for death trap engineering; he pits a bound Dynamic Duo against a drugged lion decked out in a mask of Kiron’s face, expecting the animal would be angry and confused upon waking and would, ideally, murder Batman and Robin. Listen, I’m no genius, but I did break the secret identity of Mister Mummy before Batman did, so take it from me when I say: That plan has quite a few moving parts, you know? Maybe just shoot them next time.
Still, as mummy encounters go, it’s got nothing on his Hostess Twinkies ad wherein Batman and Robin save a professor and his beautiful daughter from the advances of a fairly articulate mummy monster. Luckily Robin has a “special mummy ray gun” which I’m pretty sure is the same gun I got, and which I just call “a gun.”